Was The Trump Baby Blimp A Scam?

According to the good folks over at http://www.airships.net, a blimp is a powered, steerable, lighter-than-air vehicle whose shape is maintained by the pressure of the gases within its envelope.” 

trump blimp gif

As we can observe in this breathtaking footage, the brave men, women and xer’s who launched the “Trump Baby Blimp” were actually releasing a balloon. They were #StrongerTogether managing to #Resist the buoyancy of helium by grasping at straws strings. Limp wrists need not apply.

trump blimp crowdfunder

This balloon masquerading as a blimp was birthed via this Crowdfunder page, which has raised £32,690 thus far. Citing a £700 cost to inflate their Performance Art, we start running into some uncomfortable math. I found this website offering a 15ft. balloon, custom printed from $3,154.00 (£2383.98).

blimp bottle custom

The official word on the blimp balloon is that it cost £3,500, meaning they spent over £1000 on an extra 4 1/2 ft. of cringe.

pipi art of the deal isolated

The balloon was designed by Matt Bonner, who “works” as graphic designer for activist groups. If you accidentally ingest poison and need to purge, I suggest you check out his website, RevoltDesign. His partner on this project is “climate campaigner” Leo Murray. Here are some hot takes from Matt’s overwhelmingly eDgY website.

bonner blimp art3
WE
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and tomorrow
bonner blimp art1
I wish I were Joking

bonner blimp website

I know, I too am shaken to the core and reconsidering my life up until this point. The big question now is what will Matt and Leo do with this ~£28,000 windfall? Matt and Leo weren’t born yesterday, these keen entrepreneurial capitalists are going to milk this thing for all it’s got.

trump blimp donations

cancer spread2

Why wouldn’t they? They have legacy media selling the lie that their balloon is a blimp and claiming that “tens of thousands” are showing up for D-Day 2.0: Blimp Wars.

trump blimp UK london protests large scale

In the days leading up to this large scale protest, there was talk on dark web extremist hate sites such as 9gag.com and reddit.com/r/dankmemes regarding a possible operation involving a flying drone and some razor-blades. However, upon more thorough assessment of this modest balloon not fit for Puff Daddy’s cousin’s niece’s 7th Birthday Party; it was determined the inflatable was unworthy of the effort. We can only hope the Dark Knights of the interwebz stop these dirigible-welding tycoons before they destroy us all. Perhaps if they crowdfund enough money, and Laura Loomer’s Boomers give her enough money; the three can meet in Vegas for a  vacation  interview.

trump blimp hindenburg

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Press F For James Damore, The Only Set Of Balls Left At Google

danielle hr cunt resource

Late last week, James Damore unleashed an internal document at Google called “Google’s Ideological Echo Chamber“. The resulting Salt Tsunami was to be expected, as apparently thousands of employees have smothered him with hate mail and requests to management for his immediate dismissal. Here are some leaked caps (don’t you hate being spied upon?) from their internal Google+ network:

anothony baxter google
Anthony Baxter wants to punch Nazis and has Saved Lives

Yet, an internal poll shows that a substantial number of employees feel the same way:

google internal leak5

Somewhat surprising. Here is the memo released in response by Danielle Brown, “Google’s brand new VP of Diversity, Integrity & Governance”.

Googlers,

I’m Danielle, Google’s brand new VP of Diversity, Integrity & Governance. I started just a couple of weeks ago, and I had hoped to take another week or so to get the lay of the land before introducing myself to you all. But given the heated debate we’ve seen over the past few days, I feel compelled to say a few words.

Many of you have read an internal document shared by someone in our engineering organization, expressing views on the natural abilities and characteristics of different genders, as well as whether one can speak freely of these things at Google. And like many of you, I found that it advanced incorrect assumptions about gender. I’m not going to link to it here as it’s not a viewpoint that I or this company endorses, promotes or encourages.

Diversity and inclusion are a fundamental part of our values and the culture we continue to cultivate. We are unequivocal in our belief that diversity and inclusion are critical to our success as a company, and we’ll continue to stand for that and be committed to it for the long haul. As Ari Balogh said in his internal G+ post, “Building an open, inclusive environment is core to who we are, and the right thing to do. ‘Nuff said. ”

Google has taken a strong stand on this issue, by releasing its demographic data and creating a company wide OKR on diversity and inclusion. Strong stands elicit strong reactions. Changing a culture is hard, and it’s often uncomfortable. But I firmly believe Google is doing the right thing, and that’s why I took this job.

Part of building an open, inclusive environment means fostering a culture in which those with alternative views, including different political views, feel safe sharing their opinions. But that discourse needs to work alongside the principles of equal employment found in our Code of Conduct, policies, and anti-discrimination laws.

I’ve been in the industry for a long time, and I can tell you that I’ve never worked at a company that has so many platforms for employees to express themselves—TGIF, Memegen, internal G+, thousands of discussion groups. I know this conversation doesn’t end with my email today. I look forward to continuing to hear your thoughts as I settle in and meet with Googlers across the company.

Thanks,

Danielle

danielle brown google hr
“Googlers”

James has a PhD in Biology from Harvard, but surely the 23 year-old Diverse Feminist Nazi Punching Correct Thinking individuals know better than him.

danielel gogole hrdanielel hr don't believe her lies

danielle brown smile like this

More sauce:

Brianna Wu seems to think he wears the pants….

brianna wu google doc
he’s so gross
american inventors google
Google seems to be lacking diversity here…

Some of the reaction/salt/damage control:

BREE-GOOGLE-HASNT-READ
She hasn’t read the whole thing yet, but we should listen to her opinion since she’s not a Nazi
google manifesto weapon c
Such hostility…

***UPDATE*** James Damore has been fired in response, and is now considering legal action.

put popcorn

Are Aloha Shirts Degenerate?

Can a man walk around with flowers on his chest and still feed his family? There is no single person credited with inventing the walking postcard; they came about as Japanese, Filipino, and Chinese workers immigrated to Hawaii in the 1800’s. Kimono fabrics,  barong talongs, and multicolored silks race-mixed with native tapa (or “kapa”) cloth made from tree fibers.

hawaiin aloha maker.png
“You buy?”

It was probably just a meme, but it soon became clear that white people could be coerced into buying these shirts unironically. WWII got the ball rolling when sailors who spend all of their time on a ship with men in tight quarters mysteriously gravitated towards these loud prints.  Oddly enough, Hollywood also started to push them. Frank Sinatra and Montgomery Clift rocked Alohas in 1953’s From Here to Eternity. Bob Hope lived in them throughout his The Road film series. Then Elvis Presley donned a bright red one on the cover of the Blue Hawaii soundtrack in 1961… not to mention all the other weird sweaty Hawaii Elvis stuff.

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Salty

Then things took a turn for the complicated.  From December 11th 1980 to May 1st 1988 Tom Selleck gifted the world Magnum, P.I. His trademark “Red Jungle Bird” shirt shifted the paradigm irreconcilably. Maybe it was Marxism, maybe it was cocaine; but the 1980’s meant a man was able to dress gay yet act straight. This LARPing as a Ferrari owner fad lasted into the early 90s, when it was finally put to rest by Ace Ventura: Pet Detective.

venture aloha trap
traps are gay

These abhorrent shirts were comfortably obscure for the next decade, until a fringe element Neo-Nazi group decided to revive them. Calling themselves the #TikiRight, these boozy extremists embrace Tiki culture and idolise Tom Selleck as their ideal Alpha-Male archetype.

Tiki bars have become recruiting centres for “Tiki Terrorists”, as members of #TikiRight use Aloha shirts to signal rank and faction. Knowing who is already indoctrinated, they move in on unsuspecting patrons without matching attire. Neo-Nazi hate group speech think is occurring across the nation, as correct thinking people fall prey to these wolves in Selleck’s clothing. Dens of depravity since inception, Tiki Bars have become a matter of national security.

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